Same-sex marriage and suffer the little children

The agenda set for same-sex marriage is one which has vastly greater ramifications than many might wish to acknowledge. The problem with agendas, is that confusions are often encouraged, agendas hidden, and clear perspective denied.
A clear example of this was the 67 Referendum on indigenous ‘rights’ which was sold on a lie, an absolute lie. Many people still believe that lie although the truth is easily found. Most Australians, if asked, would say it was about giving Aborigines the right to vote – No it was not! Those pushing the agenda were happy to sell the lie because it brought desired outcomes. We should not make the same mistake again. Lies should never be the basis for law or legislation.
Same-sex couples can marry and have been able to do so for some years – in civil unions. Most religions will not marry them but no religion would marry me either and heterosexuals don’t have an automatic right to a religious marriage.
There is not a shadow of doubt that two men or two women who choose to make a life together should have equal rights as partners, in that relationship.  It is the flow-on effect, if not taken into account, which may deny the rights of children, if and when they are involved, and never more so than in this age of IVF, where, in essence, anyone can buy a baby if they wish. And they do, through exploiting poverty-stricken women in the Third World, as often as not, if a willing female is not readily available.
Sure, life has always been unpredictable and babies have been born to the worst of parents, in the worst of situations, unwanted, unloved, unexpected, but that has not been a norm and it is certainly not an ideal.  In the best of worlds you get to be raised by your real mum and dad who love you to bits and make a good job of parenting. But you get a mum and a dad, which is how you were made anyway.
In an age when mechanics make babies for anyone who wants them, pretty much, we have time to choose optimally, for that small life, that human being who has no say, and who has been created like the rest of us, from the male and the female.
The hidden agenda on the same-sex marriage campaign is the issue for many of those who have reservations. Same-sex couples can get married, so they don’t need to change anything for them to marry, and on a few counts, they may, in some States, be denied equal rights as partners and that needs to change.
But the real agenda is that of defining same-sex marriage as absolutely equal with heterosexual marriage and that has enormous implications for the rights of children, particularly in an age where anyone can pretty much buy an egg, sperm and womb to manufacture their own child to order.
To say that two fathers or two mothers are equal to a mother and a father is to deny reality of biology and humanity. None of us exist without a biological mother and father even if they are not the ones to raise us. All of us have a right to being raised by replacements for those missing parents – the male and the female, equally important.
We are, each of us, the creation of masculine and feminine and to be whole, those aspects need to be a part of our experience, particularly as children. In a perfect world everyone is raised by loving biological parents because that is as good as it gets, and everything else is second-best. However, in an enlightened society we have to think far enough ahead, to take into accounts the needs of the powerless, as indeed children are, even while seeking to meet the needs of adults.
In truth, it is impossible to have two fathers and two mothers and that is why, pretending that one can, is a denial of the human rights of the child involved.
By all means, change the marriage act to give same-sex partners equal rights but, when it comes to children, demand that same-sex parents provide a surrogate for the missing gender parent. And, demand of all parents who raise non-biological children, that they inform their child or children about the missing parent or parents and allow access to them as adults, if the child wishes. Where a child has donated sperm, egg, womb, then the individuals who provide those ‘ingredients’ must be prepared to play a part in the child’s life if the child wishes, and the parents who raise the child must support that process.
Science/medicine remains ignorant about the truth of the miracle of life, and even as the information of the mechanics increases, the ignorance does not diminish, but increase. We know that DNA passes from the foetus to the mother and vice-versa, ergo, any womb mother is a part of that child’s life forever, and vice-versa. Egg and Sperm even more so, or, perhaps not – we just do not know.
What we do know is that no human exists without a mother and a father and every human has a right to have that fact acknowledged. It matters not a whit how loving adoptive parents might be, as we can see with the damage done through forced adoption in the past, and the explosion in ancestry searches and reunions for grieving adoptees and their lost biological parents.
The core reality of same-sex parenting is that it is impossible and it is a lie. There cannot be two parents of the same sex. There can be two people raising a child of the same sex, either both adoptive or one adoptive, but it is impossible to have two mothers or two fathers.
This fantasy has been aided and abetted by science/medicine driven by greed and ego and devoid of ethics. IVF is an experiment with human life and the full effects of artificial conception and often pregnancy, will not be known for two generations. How much worse to add to the experiment the fantasy that a mother, female figure, or father, male figure, is dispensable.
Now, same-sex marriage without children is not an issue but changing laws cannot make such distinctions. And that is why, if we are to make changes, we need to do so taking into account the rights and needs of any children who might be involved.
Again, we are seeing the flow-on effect, where in this day and age, people accept same-sex couples raising children, adopting children etc., in ways which simply would not have happened in the past. In truth, until a few decades ago, and to some degree still, males were not considered capable of raising children and fathers always lost out in law.
So, we have come a long way on many counts, but it is dishonest to present the same-sex marriage agenda as simply a case of people of the same sex marrying, when, because of the nature of our society today, it is about much, much more and there are small lives which depend upon us making sensible decisions.

About rosross

Editor, writer, poet.
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5 Responses to Same-sex marriage and suffer the little children

  1. lynn__ says:

    Same-sex “marriage” is an oxymoron and same-sex parenting unbalanced. The lies we tolerate can potentially hurt many children and destroy families.

    • rosross says:

      I see no issue with same-sex marriage as long as it does not legally place same-sex parenting as equal with having a mother and a father. If two people of the same sex want to commit in a relationship as marriage then fine, but if the laws involved in changing that dictate that missing a gender parent does not matter, then it is not fine.

      Same-sex parenting is only unbalanced if a surrogate for the missing gender parent is not provided. That needs to be required in law. The problem is not two men or two women setting up home, the problem is pretending two men or two women equal a man and a woman as parents when they do not, biologically, psychologically, emotionally.

  2. lynn__ says:

    I don’t think that equals marriage biologically either 😉 but it’s good to discuss these issues. You make an excellent point about children needing both genders’ influence!

    • rosross says:

      Unfortunately marriage as defined in past times, by religion, has been the foundation of many laws. What we need to do is differentiate where children are involved.

      I personally believe that adoptive parents, even when both genders, should have an obligation to give their child knowledge of and then access to if they wish and if it is possible when they are adults.

      No doubt we will get there. I don’t think however that it is healthy for a society to believe or teach that gender is optional and something you just decide, nor that biology does not count.

  3. lynn__ says:

    Biology has laws too…you’re right, gender is not optional.

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